Pooch

Last week, we began telling individual friends about our exciting news.  On Saturday evening, I had a graduation dinner with my classmates and professors.  After I told them I was pregnant, my professor quietly commented to me that she suspected it when she saw me walk into the room.  I feel like all of a sudden over the past week, my belly has a pooch.  I'm very glad that by the end of this week, the news will be public and I won't have to hide my growing belly anymore. 

I have to admit though, having been stick thin for most of my life, seeing my tummy protrude more and more is taking some adjustment.  It's hard not to think I'm getting fat.  I do have a couple sources of comfort though:  T says he loves my belly; and ultimately, God is watching over how I grow - and God makes beautiful things.

I Think It's Sinking In

In the last week, the reality that I am going to be a parent has slowly hit home on several occasions.  Last week, I had to sign some medical paperwork and as my doctor handed me the sheet and pointed to the dotted line, I was shocked to see the words, "Mother's signature" next to the line.  I stared at it for a few seconds before signing my name.  I'm still in shock that I signed it! 

This morning, I met my OB (baby doctor) for the first time.  She used a handy little device called a Dopplar to locate our baby's heartbeat.  T was there in the room with me when we heard the rapid fire "thump thump thump thump thump."  It brought a huge smile to both our faces.

This afternoon, my mother-in-law took me maternity clothes shopping.  We discovered the hard way that all of the department stores at the mall no longer carry maternity clothes.  This is partly because most shirts these days are loose enough and long enough to be used as maternity clothes.  The unfortunate part is that they don't carry pants or underwear suitable for growing bellies.  In the end, we went to the one and only "maternity" clothing store at the mall.  After picking out several items, I went to the dressing rooms to try them on.  As I tried one item, my mom-in-law would browse the store and come back with another item or two.  I felt like I tried on at least a quarter of the store!  Oh, and they had this pillow thing that I could attach to my torso to simulate what I might look like four months from now.  I put it on under several outfits.  We giggled every time I came out of the dressing room with the insta-belly.  In the end, I got a couple dresses (perfect for summer!), a pair of capri pants and a top - all as a gift from my in-laws.  (Thanks, Mom and Dad!)  I am super-excited about wearing these clothes, not only because they're incredibly comfortable, they also let people know that I'm pregnant.  =D

No bulk buying allowed

T has quickly discovered that one of the quirks of having a pregnant wife is that I will be absolutely crazy about a certain food one day and completely abhor it the next (and by next, I mean day - or hour - or minute).  So he gave me a piece of sound advice to keep in mind every time I go out for groceries:  Don't buy anything in bulk!  Let me tell you, I have been terribly tempted at times to buy lots of whatever it is I'm craving at the moment.  But I've learned to listen to the voice of reason - and these days it sounds very much like the voice of my husband.  And I'm super glad.  Because otherwise, I'd probably be stuck with lots of Triscuits, cucumbers, hummus, cranberry juice, goat mozzarella and other things I don't even remember liking anymore.  And I'd have a fridge full of half-eaten meals.  Oh wait, our fridge IS full of half-eaten meals. 

On another note, I realized I often gag when I brush my teeth these days.  I'm wondering if it's the minty toothpaste.  So I'm trying kids "fruit flavoured" toothpaste for now.  It tastes more like bubble gum but I figure if it'll help me actually get a decent teeth-brushing instead of a race-against-the-gag kind of teeth-brushing, it'll be worth it.  And if the taste doesn't help, maybe all the Toy Story characters on the toothpaste tube will distract me enough.  ;)

Respecting the mystery

Yesterday, we spent the whole day at a hospital, keeping vigil by a relative in her last hours on earth.  I could not help but feel a sense of holiness in the moment.  Death is such a mystery.  A secret known only by God.

Yet even as I contemplated the departure of this relative, I also reflected on the formation of new life in my belly.  Conception, too, is a mystery and a secret known only by God.  How a human is knit together in the unseen places is hard to fathom. 

We have yet to tell our extended family that we are expecting.  Part of me wishes they could have known yesterday so that in the midst of grief, there could still be a glimmer of hope.  They will know soon enough.  My sister-in-law called it "Lion King" ish - the cyclical nature of the circle of life.  But isn't that true though?  And isn't that the good news of Jesus?  That in the midst of death, there is new life waiting to be born.

First Dr.'s visit

Today, we went to see my family doctor for our first prenatal appointment.  It seems like everything's ok!  She referred us to an obstetrician (aka, the OB, or what T calls "the baby doctor") in our area who happens to be female and asian (I was surprised when I heard her name - I guess I had expected a caucasian male doctor?  haha).

After giving me a thorough check-up, she sent me down to the lab to get some more tests done.  Eight vials of blood (ok, maybe it was six or seven, but it sure felt like eight!) and a urine sample later, I was free to leave.  I really had not expected so many tests.  And she said this was only half of them!

We have another appointment with the family doctor next week to finish the other half of the tests and fill in a big chart for the OB.  According to the doctor today, my projected due date is November 29, 2011.  We'll see what the OB says.

Good news is that I'm only a couple weeks away from the end of this secretly sicky and tired first trimester.  =)

Mini-olive

This week, baby is the size of an olive.  =) 

What's amazing to me is that he/she already has everything that makes up a human body.  Measuring at just about an inch, the baby already has fully formed eyes, ear lobes, internal organs, fingers and toes - everything!  It tells me that God is a God of details.  I can't imagine trying to make a functioning sculpture that small.

What amazes me more is that the olive-sized little being is merely what we can observe.  God alone is aware of this new person's personality, likes, dislikes, and character - what we cannot see about him or her.  That is the stuff that we will spend the rest of our lives trying to discover!   

I have been pondering the mystery of God lately.  This is one of those instances that brings me into that realm of mystery.